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Are you blocking your way?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/carquinyol/6158405614/Recently I did a comparison between the present me, and the me 6 years back, when I was beginning as an Engineer. What I found is that the rate of progress that I made at that time is substantially larger than the one I am making now-a-days. I couldn’t find any external reason. The only possibility is that my own thoughts and believes are causing the drag.

Six years back, my attitude was like, ‘I have nothing I can be proud of; I have nothing to loose’. But these days it seems to me that I am too conscious about the way different people perceive me. This was too big a revelation to me. I felt that I am more complex than I ever imagined (One of my guiding philosophies is ‘Sense and Simplicity’. I always wanted me and thought myself to be simple.).

There is a feeling like ‘I have a reputation, and I don’t want to spoil it’ running in the sub-conscious. This I felt is the reason why I am more conscious about what people perceive me as, rather than what I really am. This is the same thing that is stopping me from doing many things (may a-little-bit-risky things). This precisely should be the system that is causing all the drag that I am experiencing.

So what’s the way forward?. Destroy this ‘ego’. More obscurely as ‘March in the path of self destruction’ (not ‘self-destruction’; the hyphen changes the whole meaning by 180 degree). Involve in things that can really hamper your public image, and let your image be gone. Fear of height comes when you look downwards. Make yourself believe that you have nothing to loose, no social reputation, and always look up. This is the way you can overcome the fear of height, even if you are at a height.

Do you know what the best condition a man can ever get? To have a bunch of people around, who doesn’t give you any respect. This I would call as ‘Impedence matched’. Some call as ‘wavelength matched’ or ‘same frequency’. This bunch of people will look at each other, and they grow together. There is minimal drag.

Thus I am in the path of a bit transformation. Don’t know if the mission will be scrapped before the completion. But anyways, it has already begun. Let me see if I can ‘Destroy the temple and rebuild it in three days’ (Well.., I think it will take me more than even three months – but lets not alter the beauty of that quote..).

Image under creative commons license – http://www.flickr.com/photos/carquinyol/6158405614/

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