Archive for September, 2012

‘The Social Network’ – A Conspiracy Theory

September 29, 2012 Leave a comment
The Fall of Mankind. - photo by iMorpheus on Flic

The Fall of Mankind.” – photo by iMorpheus on Flickr – Creative Commons

People say that “necessity is the mother of invention”. But there are many inventions that are classified as ‘out of accident’. This the story I too used to believe, until I saw it otherwise.. Necessity is the mother of all the inventions in the human history.

There used to be two types of kids.. The ones who were introverts and the extroverts. Introverts were mostly quite people who mostly became scientists, engineers, artists and the like. Extroverts on the other hand used to be very social and worried about everyone’s problem. They were the people who were in every became the politicians, the lawyers, etc.. The introvert kids used to get a lot of ridicule for being introverted, mostly in comparison with the extrovert kids.

These kids had to suffer this kind of ridicule for many generations.. For some reason the introverts decided to unite and find and end to this never-ending suffering. After many years of research they came to the conclusion that they can put and end to the suffering only if there is no single extrovert remaining in the world. This study is the founding stone of psychology.

So they came up with detailed road-map to convert every extrovert into an introvert. But the final plan would take may generation to realize.. They began thinking about speeding up the process. They came up with the Idea of Industrialization, and Economy, in which they uses the force of extroverts also to advance the sciences, technologies, and arts. This inventions I would mark as the ‘rise of the Introverts’. They made their days more productive by inventing technologies like the automobile.

Along the process, as more and more kids got exposure to the sciences and technologies, the population of extroverts began to shrink slowly. This accelerated the pace of introverts reaching their final goal. But to compensate of the shrink in extrovert population, introvert kids invented mechanisms like the robots and the computers.

All these inventions were geared up towards one invention – ‘The Social Network’. For that they had to make the computers friendly to the extrovert people. Introverts liked the machines at its original form itself. But extrovert kids never wanted to use the complex machine. Introvert kids employed the extrovert kids to make the machine ‘simple’. Even today, the introverted kids don’t like the so-called ‘simple’ machines. For them they appeared too complex. They prefer the old version of the machine that uses a keyboard.

After many iterations of the computer, they began to see the widespread usage of the machine among the extrovert kids as well. Then they introduced their final goal.. ‘The Social Network’. This unique invention gives extroverts the feeling they used to get when interacting with people, without ever leaving their computer.

The extrovert kids didn’t accept a few of the initial versions saying it is too complex. After a comparatively less number of iteration than the computers, the introverts could make the social network sufficiently user friendly to get accepted by 90% of the extrovert population. The story continues today.. Researches confirmed the generations old assumptions of extroverts to be still true, and that through the social network, they could convert the extroverts get more ridicule than the introverts..

But there is a saying among the introvert kids that the final 10% will take up 90% of the effort. Therefore the battle is still on..Extroverts will find social networks more and more addictive, where they will post every move of them, and increasingly unsocial, making their titles incorrect..